Wes, wanting to derive the benefits of things while dismissing the responsibilities that come with them seems to be a trend in many arenas, not just relationships. Money, health, happiness—they all seem prone to the human attempt to bypass the work involved with enjoying their presence. Do you think this is a recent thing? Or has it always been this way for humans? Or do you even agree that shirking the responsibility is a modern-day phenomenon?
I agree. I believe it’s always been true but I believe that poor parenting, social media and constant busyness have all perpetuated this. Throughout history we can see the rise and fall of good and terrible leaders. Many of those stories have to do with a owning of or denial of responsibility.
The phenomena now days is the general lack of responsibility for the average person across cultures. Because we don’t have to fight a war, earn a meal or have a family, life becomes about us.
When it’s up to us, we will always choose the easy way out. Learning to own our lives gives us meaning and John Vervake and Jordan Peterson speak to this ‘meaning crisis’ well.
Great questions, I miss our dialogues and hope you are doing well.
The relationship I’m in now…from the very beginning we committed to being in with each other and has it been the most real relationship I’ve had because there’s no foot out the door.
This was a refreshing perspective, Wes. Helpful framework at the end and while not easy, those do feel like the 3 main decisions we all have to face if we want to really grow in healthy relationships. Nice essay!
Wes, wanting to derive the benefits of things while dismissing the responsibilities that come with them seems to be a trend in many arenas, not just relationships. Money, health, happiness—they all seem prone to the human attempt to bypass the work involved with enjoying their presence. Do you think this is a recent thing? Or has it always been this way for humans? Or do you even agree that shirking the responsibility is a modern-day phenomenon?
I agree. I believe it’s always been true but I believe that poor parenting, social media and constant busyness have all perpetuated this. Throughout history we can see the rise and fall of good and terrible leaders. Many of those stories have to do with a owning of or denial of responsibility.
The phenomena now days is the general lack of responsibility for the average person across cultures. Because we don’t have to fight a war, earn a meal or have a family, life becomes about us.
When it’s up to us, we will always choose the easy way out. Learning to own our lives gives us meaning and John Vervake and Jordan Peterson speak to this ‘meaning crisis’ well.
Great questions, I miss our dialogues and hope you are doing well.
It’s hard to have a genuine relationship if you have one foot out the door.
Exactly. It takes all of you over time to commit. Many of my problems have come from having one foot out the door in matters.
The relationship I’m in now…from the very beginning we committed to being in with each other and has it been the most real relationship I’ve had because there’s no foot out the door.
This is central to life itself in all its complexities: Do the hard work of healing and loving.
Fabulous article. Of great importance today.
Yes, well said. Thank you! I agree.
This was a refreshing perspective, Wes. Helpful framework at the end and while not easy, those do feel like the 3 main decisions we all have to face if we want to really grow in healthy relationships. Nice essay!
Thank you sir. I appreciate you seeing that and letting it inform how you may approach the crazy world of dating- you deserve to do it well!